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Tidy

Her: Baby, Why does that chick have Titty on her tag?

Me: Where?

Her: On that SUV in front of us... Se? T - I - D - Y...

Me: Honey that's not Titty...

Her: Then what the hell is it?

Me: Tidy...

The rest of the day was spent burtsing in to random bouts of laughter by both of us... "I need to titty up the house..."

Ewww..

Me: I pick your nose cause I love you! *tries unsuccessfully to pick her nose*

Her: Nu uh, I pick YOUR nose cause I love you *jabs finger into my nose*

Her: Ewwww... You actually let me? WTF?

It's in Spanish!!!

So... I receive this phone call:

My Darling Blonde:*Hysterical* Baby, I just won something at Burger King, but it's pissing off!

Me: What's wrong hun?

My Darling Blonde: Well, it says "Winner" but this stupid thing is in Spanish so I don't know what I won...

Me: Honey, just calm down... Just read me off what it says and I'll translate it for you...

My Darling Blonde: Okay, I'll spell it out because I can't pronounce any of it...

Me: Okay baby...

My Darling Blonde: C - R - O - I - S - S - A - N - W - I - C - H

Me: Honey that's not Spanish...

My Darling Blonde:: Yes it is...

Me: You mean Croissan'Wich... It's a breakfast sandwich....

My Darling Blonde: That's not a word!

Me: Look at the menu, honey...

*Smacks forehead*
My Darling Blonde: Honey, do all ponies grow up?

Me: *head -> steering wheel*

While Walking Down The Beach At Night:

My Darling Blonde: Honey, what is that? *points*

Me: That's a dead bird...

My Darling Blonde: Oh... *with a quixotic look on her face*

My Darling Blonde: I thought it was a skull with wings...

Me: I love you honey... *smacks forehead*